I had the lovely surprise of finding a little card on my mat as I stepped through my front door last week. Of course I wanted this package and I had two weeks to get it from them, otherwise, I only assume, it will be destroyed in the fires of postal hell. So I followed the instructions on line to get it redelivered.
Apparently you can have it delivered to a different address, 'brilliant' I thought, 'I know, I will get it delivered to my work address, that way if I'm not there it wont matter'. I merrily filled out the form smiling at my fantastic idea. Twenty minutes later I have completed the questionnaire and press 'CONTINUE' only to receive a 'NO...we cant do that!' message. Apparently a mile down the road is too far for them to deliver. Right, so, let me get this straight, you will let me change the delivery address only if it is, in fact, the same address as on the card. In other words you can't!
I then continued to try and get my package redelivered, since I really did want it, otherwise to be honest, I wouldn't have bothered. I would have taken it to be lost to the gods of post like all those Christmas cards filled with money my nan sent, its funny how the other empty cards always managed to find their way through my letterbox. So, I went back to stage one of the redelivery programme. This time instead of choosing a different address, which you cant do anyway, I decided to choose a different day. 'I can plan to be in on Monday or Thursday' I thought, 'I can work from home and make sure I am in to collect it'.
Turns out, after spending another twenty minuets I will never get back, on filling in the same useless form, that those days this week are fully booked. Oh I'm sorry I forgot that it all has to be on your terms Royal Mail, who are now holding my package hostage for me to take a day off work.
But dear readers don't fear the story from here on in just shows the depths of stupidity they can achieve. After numerous attempts at filling out the same form, with the same information, finally I found a day they could deliver. It was booked for the Monday after next. But was it? Could it really be that easy?
NO. Because on the Friday before they realised their mistake, that Monday is a bank holiday. I then received an email telling me that I should rebook the delivery or go and collect it. At this point I saw no other option than to just go and get the package myself on the notion that 'If you want something done right, do it yourself'.
Off I went after checking Google maps for directions. It took me an hour to get there and I was forced to leave work early to make this journey. When I arrived there was a que a mile long, seems like I'm not the only one that decided to do their one job of delivering mail for them.
When I finally go to the counter (after the receptionist spent half an hour refusing to take a piece of identification from a man because the corner of it had been in his mouth forcing the man to rout through his bag for another) the receptionist told me my package was not there...
Here is how the conversation ensued:
Me: "well where is it?"
Receptionist: "I don't know"
Me: "Well I'm not leaving until I get it, I have been trying to get it redelivered for two weeks now and on every occasion which have been many either your fully booked or cant deliver it. Now this utter cock up has been down to you I have the email of you admitting to that. It said to come and collect it. So where is it?"
Receptionist: "I do apologise it must have been redelivered today, have you been home yet?"
Me: "Do I look like I have been home today? If I had I wouldn't be standing in front of you in work clothes with a big back pack on."
Receptionist: "Its not my fault madam."
Me: "Now I understand that this is not your fault, personally, however, you, at this point, are the face of the company and are going to have to deal with my issues with your service."
Receptionist: "They must have redelivered it today"
Me: "That's not my fault, I didn't tell them to do that, no one was at home, again."
Receptionist: "Well you will have a redelivery notice"
Me: "which will say what?"
Receptionist: "To either rebook the delivery or come here to pick it up"
Me: "Right so you want me to go home, get the note, and come back here to pick it up? when I am already here now...to pick it up. I don't have time for that"
Receptionist: "Well we are open from 7am to 7pm"
Me: "Right, and we have already established that I work. In fact I work from 8am till 7pm, which means I had to leave work early today to come here, meaning I am losing money due to your incompetence, only to be told that you tried to deliver it on a day I clearly was not in. So now I have to go home to pick up a piece of paper to come back."
Receptionist: "erm"
Me: "Right I will be putting in a formal complaint and a claim with your head office for all the hours I have had to take off work. This is ridiculous, what is your name?"
Receptionist: "I will go and check if its in today's post"
Me: "Thank you"
He came back with my post and handed it to me.
Me: "Thank you. Do you need ID?"
Receptionist: "No, but when you get home rip up the other delivery notice please"
Me: "With pleasure, what else am I going to do with it anyway? Come here for fun?"
And that my friends is the story of the Royal Mail Saga.
