Leggings are not tights!

Tights should not be worn instead of leggings. I don’t understand why girls seem to feel the need to prance around with a short t-shirt and only tights to cover their modesty it’s just not necessary.

Last week as I was standing on the escalator on my way home from work I looked up to be faced with, what can only be described as, an almost bare bottom. I was horrified and had no idea where to look. It seemed however, that I was the only one since I was surrounded by aghast men who were ogling this young girls behind. She seemed blissfully unaware but I decided there and then I should let people know that tights are not an ideal leg covering when wearing a t-shirt. 

I have noticed this ridiculous trend snowballing in to fashion over the last two years and I’m not quite sure how it has made it this far. I have two theories though. The first theory is that the trend of the t-shirt dress from last summer somehow confused many girls who decided that they either couldn’t afford one, although that is impossible with such cheap retail outlets about, or that an ordinary t-shirt would suffice. Well it doesn’t, everyone can see your rump! My second theory, although even more unbelievable, is that a few women are confused with the difference between footless tights and leggings. Well just for all you bum flaunters, here is the difference, tights are translucent.

Most of the girls following this trend, I have noticed, look like they have miscoloured stick legs just poking out of a baggy old t-shirt. It’s obscene and it’s downright vile for any girl to wear. However, if your legs look like twiglets that are about to break do not reveal them to the world with clod hopper boots on the ends. Plus sizes you’re not getting away with it either, don’t think for one minute that the meat on your legs combined with compensating boots for ballet shoes is any better, it’s still unflattering. 

Lastly girls if you feel that you must flaunt this look, please, for the love of god wear some decent underwear. There are quite a few types and brands out there that don’t just cater for the big granny fanny but the young modest woman who dislikes the feeling of dental floss between her bum cheeks.

Oxford Street

Oxford Street used to, for me, be a magical place. Every Christmas me and my family would take a trip to look at the lights and the amazing Selfridges windows. Yes they used to put in some effort unlike now where they just chuck mannequins in the windows surrounded by fake snow laden with exquisite designer clothing that, let’s face it none of us can afford.

Anyway, before I digress any further, I loved Oxford Street even in my teens it was a place of excitement and fun. We would grab our skateboards make our way to Monument in Hyde Park and the day would inevitably end in Trocadero. We would walk up Oxford street spending our pocket money on little knick knacks and just have a great day out together.

But Oxford Street no longer brings fun and excitement. It now holds connotations of anger and frustration. I would go as far as to say I bloody hate it.

First off what is with the morons that seem to meander around in some kind of dream like state. You know the ones, and if you don’t, you’re probably that person, and if you are, Fix the hell Up. Their usually dressed to the nines, on their mobile, and think they have fallen from heaven. Their so fixated on swishing their hair and trying to be the best thing since sliced bread they have no idea about others around them. These are the ones you have to walk slowly behind because your numerous attempts to overtake have been scarpered by people coming in the other direction or a hair flick. You walk behind them thinking ‘just fucking move.’ That’s right; no one is thinking ‘oh this person is so amazing.’ Were all thinking how much we hate you and whether risking our lives in using the busy road just to get away from you is worth it.

Next there are the tourists, don’t get me wrong I have nothing against tourists, however learn how to walk will ya. They walk along jabbering with each other in one line, taking up the entire pavement. Seriously? You can’t walk in two’s, like normal people learnt in school, as children? That never stuck did it? Why take up a whole pavement? For those of you who go about in big groups please take note, don’t. Another thing you do that pisses Londoners off is when you get in a group for a picture and then the person with the camera stands there forever trying to take it. Were nice people, were accommodating people, that’s why were not walking in the cameras shot, but don’t take the piss with how long and how many you take.

Now, those people who just don’t know how to react in busy social environments, they have no idea, like they have walking aspergers. They walk along then just stop with no warning causing a situation where everyone is bumping in to the person in front. That’s right you have just caused Londoners to touch strangers...we do not like this. These are the same people who look in to a shop window about ten times, while slowly walking past. The shit in the window is not going to change within a minute, you like something go in you don’t just walk past it’s not exactly brain surgery is it. Another thing they do is just turn around and change direction, just like that, turn to face you, what are you doing? Sometimes you’re not expecting it and end up with a nose bump or worse, lip touch. I don’t want to catch your idiocy just stop it. Sometimes these people decided last minute to go in to a shop and walk right across you, almost tripping you up. They also do this at crossings walk across the crossing in a lopsided way because they obviously didn’t think it through.

So people, well done, you have destroyed Oxford Street for me, and probably many others. If your reading this and don’t know what I’m talking about then you are one of these people. Take note and just sort it out.